How to write a eulogy for a close friend
A close friendship is its own form of family — quieter, often more honest, sometimes longer than a marriage. This guide helps you find words for what that meant to you.
Where to start
4 · steps- 1
Begin with a specific instance — a moment, a phone call, an inside joke. Friendship lives in the particular.
- 2
Show what they noticed about the world that nobody else did. Good friends have a way of seeing things.
- 3
Acknowledge the people in their life who lost more than you did — partner, children, parents.
- 4
End with something you owe them — a habit you picked up, a question they once asked that you still carry.
How to write a eulogy for a close friend
Marco and I lived in different cities for the last twenty years of our friendship — three time zones apart, four after he moved again. The friendship survived because of two things: he always picked up, and he never started with "how are you." He started with the sentence in the middle of whatever he had been thinking about. "The trick with onions," he would say at one in the morning, "is patience." It was as if no time had passed. What I will miss is that he kept my mind awake. He had a way of asking questions — small, slanted, never the obvious ones — that made you say things you didn't know you thought. After every call with him, I had three pages of notes I never showed anyone. I don't know who I'll call now when something interesting happens. I keep reaching for the phone.
Your words will fit better.
Share one or two memories — the speech will assemble itself in minutes.